


Bad Parenting

by Luigi_Luigi



Category: Camp Camp (Web Series)
Genre: basically David insults himself for several years, dadvid, post foster/adoption, woo its been while eh
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-27
Updated: 2020-01-27
Packaged: 2021-02-19 03:36:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,019
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22437898
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Luigi_Luigi/pseuds/Luigi_Luigi
Summary: In retrospect, David could have been a little less optimistic and a little more realistic when considering the idea of being a parent.
Relationships: David & Max (Camp Camp)
Comments: 7
Kudos: 160





	Bad Parenting

**Author's Note:**

> I started this out as something meant to be funny but then it turned into David's personal analysis of himself lmao,,, It's a little funny if you *wink* read between the lines *wink wink* :,D

David wasn’t the most put together adult. He was young and inexperienced. Though he strode with optimism, he tended to be incredibly clueless. Still he managed to remain chipper in the face of hardships thrown at him. He had yet to grow weary as others had when dealing with the melodrama of life. 

But he was getting there. 

“David, my shoe is broken.”

In retrospect, David could have been a little less optimistic and a little more realistic when considering the idea of being a parent. A very young, very single parent. 

“How broken?”

Most of the ideas of parenthood revolved in a limbo between it being a terrifying event, a treasured event, and a completely incomprehensible event. Apparently no one knew how to do it, even the adults that already went through it several times.

“The-entire-sole-fell-off broken.”

Theoretically, the universal lack of knowledge should make the act less pressured, but really just made it all the more difficult and confusing. And what one parent may think, another may not, leading to a whole other layer of judgment.

“Duct tape it.”

David, personally, had been intending to take Max to get a new pair of sneakers quite recently. Life’s chaotic schedule did not allow him to do this immediately, of course, like an adequate parent might figure out how to do. 

“You want me to walk around school with my shoe fucking duct taped together.”

He’d planned to take the kid to a shoe store this weekend. Possibly right after school. But as usual, life had once again thrown a hardball at him. Which resulted in the situation where Max was holding up his broken shoe so that David could assess the damage through the rearview mirror as he drove him to school.

“Seriously, David, these are two whole separate pieces now.”

“It’s just for today. I was going to take you to get new ones after school.”

Max let his completely fallen apart shoe drop to the seat.

“I need new ones  _ now _ .”

David couldn’t help but feel very certain that Max waited until they were on the way to the school to tell him exactly how very broken his shoe actually was. He was also pretty sure Max expected him to eventually say, “Right, so I’m dropping you off late to school because we had to make a quick stop at a shoe store?”

“Yes.”

David sighed and flipped on his blinker to turn at the next street. Away from the school. 

“Oh, shit. Uh, my other shoe is broken now, too.”

Oh, he was  _ so _ bad at being a parent. 

This thought was nothing new. It was something proven to him almost constantly as he attempted to raise Max. From remembering to get him a new sweater to trying to provide him with 3 square meals a day. If he looked at it like a bland concept, it wasn’t too different from just being a camp counselor. 

He had to balance the camp bills and look after chaotic energy that was children. There were a lot more children at the camp. David only had to worry about Max at home. But David also had some help from his co counsellor at the camp. 

“Have you finished your homework?”

And really it was all about the details of looking after a kid that made it so hard. The camp was temporary and minimal. 

“No.”

Max was more high maintenance. It seemed even more so when he was on his own. 

“Why not?”

The kid was incredibly difficult. David couldn’t help but think, on occasion, that things would be a little easier if Max was a little more easy going. One of those nice, cheerful kids everyone couldn’t help but love. 

“I got stuck on a problem.”

The thought is nice, admittedly. Except that the reason David was so intrigued by Max was because of his unpleasant disposition. Had the kid been, well,  _ nice,  _ he likely would have been overlooked. 

“Do you want help?”

Nice people are fine people. People who smile all the time are more likely to be content than upset. David wouldn’t have needed to give very much attention to a kid who was excited to be at camp. 

“Um. Okay.” 

Not that it was a good thing. His situation, his grouchiness. It truly would have been better if Max’s parents actually cared. If they actually tried to raise their kid to be a good one. Then maybe David wouldn’t have to struggle to keep Max from being a bad one. 

Not that Max was a bad kid either, but, oh. Well. He was difficult. And while David cared, he cared very much, he couldn’t help but wonder how much better he was doing than the kid’s parents. Because it wasn’t all Max’s fault for being the way he was, nor was it was it David’s. 

“David, where are you?”

But still remained the fact of picking up the pieces. Undoing the damage. Fixing the mistakes. David would like to think he was doing better. To him Max always seemed to be doing better. Improving. Becoming happier. 

“Uh, I just got home. Why?”

David, on the other hand, knew that he was struggling to keep pace. He could try all he wanted, he wasn’t parent material. Oh, it was a joy when your kid got a good grade on their test or when they smile because you take them out for ice cream. 

“Oh, no reason. Just that I’m still at the fucking store.”

But he was a forgetful person. He had a tendency to overlook things. To be childish himself. He did things wrong sometimes. A lot of times. 

“I LEFT YOU THERE?”

He’d get better in time, he told himself. He’d improve. He’d learn and adapt. The fact that it was for Max was motivation enough. He couldn’t help the nagging little thoughts, though. The ones that nipped at his brain late at night and kept him from sleeping. 

Maybe he shouldn’t have ignored Max talking that one time, even though he had been so tired. Maybe he should have been more patient, even though Max had been aggravating him all day. Maybe David was just as neglectful as Max’s parents and he’s simply excusing himself by thinking he cares more. 

“They cared.” Max had told him one night. “They cared about me enough to keep me alive for 10 years.”

They cared, but not really. Not enough to keep him any longer. David cared. Enough to keep pestering the kid even when he snapped at him. He cared enough that he bent over backwards to support Max. He cared enough to always keep trying and never even think of stopping. 

He still couldn’t stop thinking that it wasn’t quite enough. No one really wants to be a bad parent. No mother or father sets out to be awful and terrible. Maybe they didn’t want to be a parent. Maybe they learned wrong. Maybe they never learned at all. 

At least, that’s what David tells himself. Optimistic, as always. He wonders if Max would hate him for trying to make up excuses for his parents. He wonders if Max would hate him if he sometimes wished they were dead. Neither of them really like talking about Max’s parents, though. 

“DAVID! I THINK I FUCKED UP!”

David didn’t recall Max leaving the house. He didn’t mind him going out late at night, so long as the kid told him where he was going. David would prefer to huff and disapprove before letting him leave rather then Max slipping behind his back. Which he would if he really wanted to. 

“What did you do? Do I need to worry about police again?”

There wasn’t a need for Max to sneak out of the house, so it was concerning that he did. Every rule has its flaws, David had learned over the years. What had David gotten wrong this time?

“What? No. I-I don’t know.”

Admittedly, he was pleased that Max was talking to him about it. Even if it was after the fact. Despite how inadequate David always felt, it was like a weight lifted once he figured out how hard lack of communication made things. The hard part after that was actually getting Max to open up. 

“Why don’t you start from the beginning. What happened?”

Gwen had once suggested David try reading parenting books. David did try. He went to a library and browsed the shelves while Max looked at the fishtank in the kids area. 

“Okay. Okay. So, Spacekid started taking really hard classes for his space shit and he’s having trouble passing them.”

The books for new parents were about babies. The books for older kids were just about them being teenagers. Max wasn’t either of those things, leading to David chickening out and simply checking out a nature documentary. 

“And he tried to get Neil to tutor him, since he’s a smart ass. Except Neil said no, so Spacekid apparently thought I was the next best thing.”

David’s struggles didn’t fit in the textbook box of parental difficulties. He wasn’t a decently aged man with a good job with a lovely wife and two kids he helped look after. He didn’t deal with baby proofing his house or have insights from his spouse on how to raise their children. 

“I only said yes so he’d stop bugging me. I figured he’d eventually lose interest or see how pointless it was.”

David was 24 when Max’s parents never came back. He was single and worked at a crummy little camp. His kid was unpredictable because of things he didn't have any control over, but the way Max turned out was entirely dependant on David. 

“But he’s serious about it and he’s been getting upset about still getting shitty grades. It started getting to me because he’s really trying, but I’m not actually that good at what he needs help with so I can’t help him.”

He was aware that most people probably didn’t actually fit into the textbook family outline, but sometimes he couldn’t help but wish that he did.

“And- and- I broke into the school so I could cheat his grade.”

If he did things might be easier, better, the books might actually be helpful. David might be able to stick to his true optimism and think that he was a perfect parent because, look, he followed the good parent tips to a T. He wouldn’t feel bad about having to refrain from telling Max that he was sorry for being a bad parent, for fear of guilt tripping him. 

“Oh.” David said. 

Then David remembers that he never even thought about being a parent. He hadn’t planned out his life that far, wasn’t even sure if that was the direction he wanted to go.

“Aren’t you going to tell me I done bad?”

It would be nice if he had a cookie cutter family, but he hadn’t prepped for that life anymore than he did this one. He’d taken Max with full confidence, not because he felt ready or because he thought he knew what he was doing. 

“Well, sure, if you broke into the school to cheat your own grade, but you kind of caught me off guard with the whole selflessness angle.”

He’d done it because he had to. Impulsively, Gwen had put it. Perhaps.

“Look, do you think you could… break back into the school and uncheat his grade?”

He certainly hadn’t put much thought into the decision, but that was because he didn’t need to. For all the thinking and what-ifs he could've come up with, the answer would have always been yes. 

“You’d condone that?”

And he supposed that might just be the point of it all. Because, no, David wasn’t a perfect parent. Goodness knows if he’d ever be. Who knew if anyone was truly a good parent. 

“Two wrongs don’t make a right, but I’m willing to make an exception.”

The point was that he tried. 

“Can I get a ride?”

He was still trying.

“Of course.”

He’d never stop trying.


End file.
